GRATITUDE LISTS

This is free therapy.

I recently read on a website that writing a gratitude list is a great way to help push through writer’s block. If nothing else, such a list provides a wealth of material on which to write. More importantly, engaging in this discipline can help move a person through various negative states of mind such as anxiety, complacence, ungratefulness, despair, anger, and at minimum, helps to right-size exaggerated emotions and perspectives when they get out of balance. I’ve found this to be true when I write out a gratitude list.

I’ll often start planning to write 20 things I’m grateful for and usually I just keep writing and writing – it just flows out of me. I’m always amazed at how many good things – blessings – I have in my life for which to be grateful. Doesn’t mean I don’t have problems, sorrows, or unresolved issues…but it does help me not allow those negative circumstances to take over my consciousness. I encourage you to do the same. Here’s an example of mine today (in no particular order of importance) – a jumping off point for you.

1. I have people around me who love me
2. My family members and I are healthy
3. We have gainful employment
4. We own a home that we love
5. We like our neighborhood and surrounding community
6. Summer vacation is coming soon
7. My children’s schools are excellent
8. My children are all thriving in school
9. My family is continuing to learn better forms of communication and problem-solving
10. Our city is out of drought status
11. I’ve found writing to be such a wonderful, creative outlet
12. God’s mercy and blessings in our lives
13. My personal strengths which I often minimize and take for granted
14. The wonder and beauty of nature
15. Delicious food
16. Chocolate
17. A free and democratic country to live in
18. Advanced medicine
19. A society in which women have more rights and freedoms than in centuries past
20. Access to medical care
21. My oldest son’s entry into manhood
22. The hilarious and unique sense of humor of my middle son
23. My youngest son’s “little boy” cuteness
24. A hot cup of coffee with cream in the mornings
25. My comfortable bed
26. Fifteen years with our wonderful dog Chelsea – may she rest in peace
27. Warm baths in the winter
28. Great fiction books to read
29. The soothing, comforting quality of chicken broth
30. Two functioning cars

No I haven’t Come Down from the Royal Wedding Yet

Two recent international events of global significance have dominated the news recently but one leaves me happy, the other more sobered.

Despite six hours of watching every bit of possible television coverage of the Royal Wedding last Friday, I’m still enjoying tidbits of information that have dribbled out since. I arose at 4:30 am to cook eggs and sausage and brew coffee and tea in preparation for my British friend to join me with her famous scones, jam and whipped heavy cream (clotted cream substitute). We ate and talked our way through the entire affair. Such good “girl fun” -- a rarity for me, a mom of all boys.

I know the news has shifted to the assassination of Osama bin Laden – incredible news in its own right, and a triumph of the tireless efforts of multiple administrations and intelligence – but it is a subdued type of rejoicing. Certainly a long-awaited justice but one that has come with much human suffering and ended in bloodshed, violence and death, albeit the death of a crazy, evil man. Well, it’s not over yet; we all know that there will likely be retaliatory events but what, how and when remain uncomfortably mysterious. For now, we get to learn of all the details that went into the mission. I do find all that military stuff fascinating to be sure, but it doesn’t have the same effect on my psyche. Somehow the collective rejoicing and high spirits that came with months of eager anticipation of the royal wedding – not to mention that there was not a tea drop of terrorist activity and basically went off without a hitch – left us with a huge, happy dopamine flood. There were 45 crowned heads present and not one explosion. Approximately one million people gathered outside of Westminster Abbey and then promenaded down the Mall to Buckingham Palace in orderly fashion. I hate to sound exclusive but it seems to be that only the British can pull this kind of thing off. They are known for their sense of orderliness and decorum.

But there is truly something special about a couple in love that people are cheering on to be together. It’s not some silly celebrity couple that have been together for three months, but one that has made a go of their relationship for nine years through such obstacles that we “regular people” don’t face like media pressures and centuries old royal tradition. Perhaps the visual feast and pageantry played a big part in making it so memorable and wonderful (for those of us Anglophiles and Royalty fans). The beautiful clothing, the rich music, the ancient words in the Anglican wedding service, the bells, even those wild hats were such fun to see. Kate and William carried off their wedding with grace and beauty and seem to bring hope for a future monarchy that blends the ancient with modern, respect for conventional royal tradition with breaking protocol in favor of fresh, innovative, practical ways to living as a royal. In light of the pain and suffering his mother experienced, William is courageously going forward with lessons learned and we will be watching supportively.

I realize these collective celebrations are so rare; they only come around once in a blue moon. It was truly a memorable weekend.